The Gift of One Day at a Time

Photo Credit: My husband

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of One Day at a Time

“Before your head hits the pillow tonight, remind yourself of the things you did right. Let go of the things you could have done better. Be patient with yourself, and remember that big things are achieved not all at once, but rather one day at a time.”

Unknown

There are days when you just can’t find the strength.

There are days when you feel that your feelings are on the brink.

There are days when loneliness persists.

There are days you wonder, “What did I miss?”

There are days when it is all that you can do is to put one foot in front of the other. 

There are days when you feel you will never recover.

There are days when you climb that mountain top

There are days you just wish you could make it to the base of the hill.

No matter where your feelings lie.

Remember dear one, before your head hits the pillow at night.

To give yourself some grace and remember God’s love.

When you find yourself in a place where there is little to no self love.

Remember those little steps that you took.

One moment at a time, day by day.

Be patient with yourself, find the small things that you did right.

So that when you do reach the mountain top, you’ll see you did it one day at a time.

There is a song that I remember from the Baptist church as a child. It was called “One Day at a time, Sweet Jesus.” In the song the lyrics ask for the strength to do the things that you need to do day by day. The song continues on by asking for God to show them the way one day at a time. I will say, 2023 has been a year where there have been days that it was all that I could do to put one foot in front of the other. I know of several folks who have truly struggled to make it this year. Add on top of that the wars that are being waged all over the world. The division in our country, the news media, social media, etc… etc.. etc..  It can be a bit overwhelming. What do we do? If you are a person of faith, prayer comes to mind. Find something to fill your soul and spirit that will lift you up. Find that attitude that you were able to put one foot in front of the other. This is a deeply personal subject to me. When I was rushed to the hospital with a blood pressure of 210/120, my pulse was pushing 170. I was scared. The ambulance folks thought I might be having a stroke or some sort of heart issue. As I made it to the hospital they discovered that my organs were basically shutting down. The liver was not great, the kidneys, etc.. I was not doing well. I had 12 banana (nutrient) bags, 15 hours of magnesium infusions, 8 hours of potassium infusions, etc…  I also had a paralyzed stomach, I could keep no food down, nor water. Then… I found out my iron was so low that in the words of the Dr, “It is a wonder you can put one foot in front of the other.”  This was all due to a very popular drug that is on the market for the treatment of diabetes. When I was talking to my nurse friend a few days ago, we were catching up after my recovery. She looked at me and told me that I was very fortunate to be alive. She explained with everything that was wrong I am a walking miracle. I had realized this, but I have/had been struggling with the fact that along with those issues my immune system was also very compromised. I have/had been giving myself a hard time that I still cannot do everything that I would like. I have cried, I have wailed, I have beaten myself up over and over because I was not doing everything that I could to help at home. I had to let others care for me. To my husband’s credit he stayed by my side. He bought me ensure. He took me back to the hospital when I was so weak I could barely stand. Yet here I was, still beating myself up. After my long talk with my nurse friend I decided enough was enough. My numbers are slowly improving, I have more strength today than I did a few months ago. I had to stop. I needed an attitude adjustment pretty quickly. Each day I try to find something that I did to move myself forward. I started bike riding again last week. That is huge. I huffed, I puffed, I was sore, I only made it two miles but I did it. Yesterday, I made it eight miles. It was slow. I was sucking wind like a trooper but I did it. Why do I share this? Well, I have been attending counseling recently to deal with a variety of life issues. It was in a session that I was encouraged to share my struggles so that maybe, just maybe I could help someone else and in turn, remember those steps that were taken. I will say, all of this was by the grace of God. So dear readers, I encourage you if you are struggling to take it one day at a time, one prayer at a time, one step at a time. You will eventually reach the top of that glorious mountain and take in the view. As I have written in other musings, the valley will come again. But, you climbed that mountain once. You will be more equipped to climb higher next time, one day at a time. 

One Day at a Time

By :Marijohn Wilkin and Kris Kristofferson.

My books are on Amazon!

The Quacktastic Adventures of Ellie and Lord Barks a Lot

The Gift of Changing Seasons

This is at Berry College in Rome, GA. Each season highlights this beautiful area.

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of Changing Seasons

“Winter is an etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting, and autumn a mosaic of them all.”

Stanley Horowitz

Have you ever heard the phrase, to everything there is a season? 

This phrase is written for a very specific reason.

There are seasons in life that are sometimes like winter.

Or there are times when life is like fall in all its colorful splendor.

The rustle of spring when flowers come to life.

Or the lazy hazy days of summer where lemonade, lightning bugs and long hot days grace our life.  

Life is much like seasons, where we can find some beauty.  

Whether that day may be a day drenched in white snow, a blank canvas for beauty. 

Life may be a bouquet of thrift flowers with their purple and blue hue.

Or the fiery red leaves on a crisp fall day.

To everything there is a season!  Embrace that phrase.

May the beauty of each season grace all of your days. 

I wrote this exactly a year ago. I am still trying to figure out what season our lives are in at the King household. One thing is sure. I will wait and pray until it is apparent what this seasons of our lives holds for us.

It is fall here in the south. There is a freeze warning set for tomorrow.  In the south, where summer sometimes seems like it goes on forever, the first sign of a crispy colorful leaf gets some of us quite excited. The neighbors have pumpkins and fall garland decorating their porch.  This season just sends a great sense of warm and cozy anticipation for things yet to come.  Life is so much like our seasons.  Each season is markedly different yet full of beauty.  In the winter, the first snowfall that blankets the landscape absorbs all the sound and looks like a painting.  Spring, the world comes to life, the greens are varying shades of beauty.  The flowers are peaking through to make their grand finale in the summer.  So much beauty to be had.  In the fall the mountains look like an absolute painter’s canvas of color, adding the crispiness of the cool days and a warm fire.  You are in a space of absolute delight.  In the summer the trees and flowers mature.  The ferns put on a show.  The twinkle lights and fairy lights sway while the wind gently blows.  How can we learn from seasons?  They are very much like life.  If we don’t change, if seasons don’t change we stagnate.  We become inactive and dull.  When we become dull we lack the vividness and brightness life can bring.  While change and growth can most certainly be painful it is quite necessary to grow.  That is what seasons teach us.  Always start each day with a sense of purpose for that season in your life.  To be more honest, to be more empathetic, to take a moment for yourself so that you can recharge to help others.  So much of life in the last few years in the public sphere has been base and argumentative.  Let us, the everyday people embrace what divides us and walk across the aisle and find what unites us.  There is a great fear that humanity is in a season of distress.  I believe most of us would agree.  The way we change those who cleave to dullness, stagnation and never changing seasons is to find what is beneficial in that season and move from there.  Embrace the seasons in your life!  The changes are an opportunity to make you a better person.  Much like the mum in the fall that blooms with great beauty, it has to be deadheaded so that more growth can occur.  Much like flowers in the spring and summer need to be pruned to encourage more growth. As flowers begin to bloom in spring, some parts do not fully germinate because it would be detrimental to the rest of the plant.  This serves for greater growth.  Finally, in winter when things become dormant and rest.  That rest is to serve to bring a productive, beautiful growing season through the rest of the year.  Seasons can teach us a great deal .  Let’s grow through each season.  

The Gift of Tenancity

This is Schloss Laufen on the Rhine on the border of Switzerland and Germany.
When I visited this place my first thought was, "Wow, that had to take some nerve to build a castle on top of a raging waterfall in the Rhine."  That is tenacity. 

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of Tenacity

“Tenacity is setting a goal so big you can’t possibly achieve it, then growing into the person who can!”

Are you tenacious?  

Do you hold on tight?

Do you never give up without a fight?

To be tenacious is to have a steel will. 

Tenacity is needed to make it through this ride we call life.

To try and not give up when all around you is nothing but strife.  

Tenacity is hard when all around you see, is bickering and arguing and hearing folks say, “Me! Me! Me!”

Take the tenacious parts about your life that are good and keep calm and carry on.

It is the tenacious person, the person that can see the good even when that good part is minute. 

Being tenacious can be a great teacher imparting wisdom and patience.  

So try being tenacious and you might see life’s endless possibilities.

Are you tenacious?  Do you stick with it when the going gets tough?  So many items in life are disposable these days.  We want the “quick fix’” It is almost as if longevity, fortitude, investing time, love and resources into one object will make it last a lot longer.  If you were to look at a lot of successful businesses and read about those who began said businesses you will hear one common thing.  They did not give up even when the going was quite tough.  Tenacious people work smarter.  They see a problem and think, “I have tried to do this a certain way many, many times to no avail.  Why don’t I approach the problem differently than before and see if I get a different outcome.” Tenacious thinkers are problem solvers.  What in your life have you tried over and over in the same method with little to no results?  Step back, take a breath, and try to approach the issue a different way.  I am sure that you have heard in your life, “We have always done it that way.”  I would argue that those who have achieved some sort of success with their goals have approached their situations in a myriad of ways until they achieved success.  Tenacity is knowing that you will not achieve your definition of greatness overnight.  There will be days when you take two steps and there will be days you will take ten thousand steps.  The point is, you took the steps.  Take exercising for example.  I have met a few people who actually love exercising (why?), but most of the time in all the years I worked in fitness, folks are not keen to work out.   I started telling my clients you made it here!  You have won part of the battle.  Next time we will add a few more repetitions, a few more squats, a few more exercises until you feel that you can reach your goal.  When our little son was about three we had a baby shower for my twins who had just been born.  We were given a lovely lemon cake to take home.  It was in a big round plastic container.  Our son kept scooting a chair to the counter to try and get the cake.  He was obsessed!  My husband ended up putting the cake on top of the refrigerator knowing that this little precocious man would certainly not be able to reach it.  I was tending the twins, my husband was tending to other things around the house.  I thought he was watching our 3 year old.  As I put the twins in bed our son came into our bedroom rolling the plastic container like a ball.  I said, “Good grief, how did you get that?!”  I went into the kitchen. He had figured out that if he scooted the chair by the counter and climbed up on the counter he could barely reach the cake.  He devised that if he used a wooden spoon he could knock the cake off the top to the floor, get off the counter, slide onto the chair then roll the cake to me.  He could not hold the container because it was very, very big.  His little arms could not hold it.  Well, I would call that tenacity!  One last quote to share.  “Often it’s tenacity, not talent that rules the day.” Julia Cameron.  Truer words could not have been spoken.  

My books are on Amazon!

The Quacktastic Adventures of Ellie and Lord Barks a Lot

Clean it Up!  Wash it Up!

Coming Soon:

The Case of the Missing Honk Honk

The Case of the Missing Ornaments

Appalachian Allegory

 

The Gift of Leaving a Gift to Your Future Self

I like to look at this photo as a gift. A nice walk in NY on a beautiful fall day. 

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of Leaving a Gift to your Future Self

“Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one!”

Brad Paisley

What is a future gift for yourself?

What could it be?

It does not have to be anything monumental, perhaps a small thought or quote for just you to see.

There may be days when you need the gift, particularly when times are hard. 

The present could be a fond memory to give you the little bit of temerity to keep on going when the day seems bleak. 

Cultivate a gift for your future self. 

Make it part of the recipe of your life. 

When it is time to open the gift, it will be right there for you to help you cope with life.

My husband has said to me many times over the years, “Did you leave a gift for your future self?” The first few times he said it I honestly was confused at what he was saying.  I asked him what that meant to him.  He explained that in life we get tired, we get bored, we get angry, we just have those days where we literally feel the phrase, “I got nothing.” That is the time you should pull out that gift to your future self.  For my husband, it would be organization. He is quite possibly the most organized person on the planet. If I do not know where something is located, he does.  His penchant for organization is both annoying and endearing. When he is weary and feeling down he has a “bug out bag” that has all his clothes cleaned and pressed, his toiletries ready precisely where they need to go and his shoes and socks ready to receive his feet. This concept made me ponder what could be gifts that we could leave for our future self when we just are exhausted, annoyed, angry, or any range of emotions where we need to take a step back?  Obviously your gift does not have to be organization.  Your gift could be a little basket with your favorite tea, a book, and some chocolate.  Your gift could be various quotes stashed all over where you live to remind you that you can make it through this. Your gift to your future self could be that prayer or scripture that gives your spirit a little boost. When we invest in ourselves particularly when you are low, this activity fills you back up so that in turn, you can give to others. I have a friend who constantly struggles with negativity. He constantly deals with trusting others to be good humans, so much so that he is unwilling to entertain new friends or even open up to family members who love him very much.  Recently he discovered the concept of leaving a gift for his future self.  For him, he starts his day with scripture, daily affirmations and positive thoughts through music. While he still struggles with his distrust of others, his attitude has markedly changed from where his emotions were 6 months ago.  For him, he had to give himself a few moments of gifts for his future self daily.  Find your future self gift, wrap it up and put it in a safe place for when you truly need restoration and respite.  I leave you with a quote from the Dalai Lama “If you feel burnout setting in, if you feel demoralized and exhausted, it is best for the sake of everyone, to withdraw and restore yourself.” 

Source:Good Housekeeping 

My books are on Amazon!

The Quacktastic Adventures of Ellie and Lord Barks a Lot

Clean it Up!  Wash it Up!

Coming Soon:

Appalachian Allegory

The Case of the Missing Honk Honk

The Case of the Missing Ornaments

The Gift of What?

Photo credit: My husband

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of What?

“Listen.  People start to heal the moment they feel heard.”

Cheryl Richards

What?  A common phrase. 

It is a word that signals to listen, to pause, and let the other person be heard.

I beg your pardon, excuse me, I’m sorry, what did you say?

These are all words related to active listening in a meaningful way.

To listen is sometimes all a person needs. 

To be heard, to be acknowledged, when they feel no one will listen to what they have to say.

To listen is to take the attention from self to another. 

To be all ears and share in their struggles can also open your mind. 

We all need to listen these days because it seems the yelling persists.

The talking over, the dismissal of ideas and feelings we just can’t continue this course of events.

So take a moment when someone says what, you could be the person that causes another soul to feel they are significant in a world that often makes others feel small.

What? Two of my sons say it all the time.  I will say it was annoying to hear that phrase constantly.  I thought they were not listening to what I had to say.  Well, after I asked why they say what all the time they both shared with me that they have military grade tinnitus.  All of the years of Army training had impacted their hearing.  They meant no disrespect, they honestly could not hear me.  That gave me pause after their explanation.  The act of listening without judgment was a lesson that needed to be learned.  So much of our world is geared toward judgment.  You see someone who looks frazzled and you think they don’t take care of themselves.  What if something truly tragic happened in their life?  We have no way to know.  Listening is not exactly portrayed very well in the media.  Shows where folks yell over each other rather than thoughtfully listening and asking questions when they disagree.  When we decide to actively listen, particularly to those we disagree with, we repeat, “I hear you saying” is an excellent place to start.  What happens when we start this practice?  People feel a little bump of goodness to their self esteem when they feel heard.  Also, try not to interrupt.  Let them finish their thought. This will help you to understand the speaker and the speaker to feel understood.  You may be asking yourself, “Why would I do this?  People are self absorbed these days!”  Yes, some are.  I would wager a lot are suffering on the inside.  Change has to start in small steps. One person at a time. I leave you dear readers with this funny story.  When my twins were little I bought some fiber chocolate bars.  The boys were going through a growth spurt, they were about 10 years old.  So basically they were eating machines.  If it was edible.  It was fair game.  I brought the fiber bars home and put them in the pantry.  After that, the kids were briefed about said fiber bars.  The twins in their haze of hunger chose not to hear what mom had to say.  My husband and I went out on a date, the twins were watched by their teenage siblings.  Generally speaking after a night out when you are entertaining feral eaters one needs to assess the carnage that was eaten.  I open the pantry and GASP!  There were about 20 fiber bars gone!  I called the kids in, asked who had eaten 20 fiber bars and it was the twins.  The conversation went something like this, “Did you not hear me when I said these were FIBER bars?!” The twins both looked at me and said, “No mom, I did not hear you.”  Needless to say much weeping, wailing and toilet punishment went on for about 24 hours.  The boys definitely learned a lesson that day.  I encourage us all to both embrace the word what and listen when someone says what.  We could start a “What?” revolution!  

Source:mindtools.com 

My books are on Amazon!

The Quacktastic Adventures of Ellie and Lord Barks a Lot

The Case of the Missing Moo-Cow Bell

The Case of the Missing Bumbly Wumbly Bee

The Case of the Missing Wellies

The Case of the Missing Honk Honk

The Case of the Missing Ornaments

Clean it Up! Wash it Up!

Coming soon:

Appalachian Allegory

Buy me a coffee… pretty please… actually it would be a proper cuppa in my case. Thank you for reading! 

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Positive Pensées

Paypal:  familyking8@gmail.com

  

The Gift of When No One is Looking

Be the best version of yourself, even when no one is looking.

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of When No One is Looking

“Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is watching.”

C.S. Lewis

In the nooks and crannies where no one sees, are you still the same person you portray yourself to be? 

Do you say kind things when in the open and perform acts of kindness to be called great?

What about when no one is looking?  Do you still maintain your straight and narrow way?

In a time where folks do things for likes, shares, and attention. 

Will you perform the same action when no one is looking?

Let us examine our motives, our heart and our lives.

When performing an act of kindness try to keep this idea in mind.

Don’t let your right hand know what your left is doing.

Perform the act of service, just with one concept in mind. 

To love, to give with no real notoriety.

Be the best you can be when no one is watching.

Because one day in the rare event you think no one is watching, someone will be viewing your activities and you will give them purpose, a vision, a direction of who they could choose to be.  

How many folks have you encountered in life that are just not who they seem?  When no one is watching they might be just awful. Or, the person may not be nefarious at all.  They may just want the attention.  Recently I was challenged with an interesting concept.  If I could get away with just about anything would I still live a life with a moral compass. This concept is quite interesting.  What would you do?  What would I do?  One of the most talented artists of the 80’s was George Michael.  I am sure that there are some folks that have never heard his velvety voice and his dulcet tones.  One of his well-played songs would probably be “Wake me up before you go.”  The canon of music he shared with the world until his untimely death was quite immense.  He lived the life of a rich musician and star. He had a lot of struggles through his short life with drugs, alcohol, all the trappings of a celebrity life.   What many folks did not know is that he gave immensely to many charities.  He went undercover to homeless shelters and fed the hungry.  He paid debts of random strangers just because he could.  One time, George was sitting in a cafe.  He overheard a stranger crying over 25,000 pounds of debt.  He finished his meal, quietly gave a check to the server and asked them to give it to the random stranger.  When his mother died he gave a free concert for nurses.  The list is endless of what acts of kindness this multi-millionaire performed in service to his fellow humans.  A lot of these acts were discovered after his death.  While I realize that most of us will never be filthy rich (I wish!) we can learn a lesson from George Michael’s example.  People need help, we need integrity.  Most of the time these acts or decisions will not be in untroubled or “public” arenas.  These deeds will most likely come to our attention when you least expect them to happen.  I would encourage us all when there is nary an eye to see what we are about, that we live a life of integrity, purpose and gratitude.  One final quote by none other than George Michael himself “My ambitions have always been to make the quality of my life better but not in a material way.” In his short 53 years on planet earth I would wager to say that in the nooks and crannies.  In his alone time, George lived out his vision.  He gave when no one was looking.  He did not shout it from the rooftops. He did not take a video and share it for the world to see.  He just did it.  May we learn from his attitude of giving.  Give with no expectation of anything in return.  

Source:Smoothradio.com

My books are on Amazon!

The Quacktastic Adventures of Ellie and Lord Barks a Lot

Clean it Up! Wash it Up!

Coming soon:

Appalachian Allegory

The Case of the Missing Honk Honk

The Case of the Missing Ornaments

The Gift of Clean Sheets

I took this at a Naval Base in Rhode Island.  It just reminds me of your mind after you spent time cleaning inside...  a beautiful canvas that can be built upon.

Positive Pensées

Kathy King

The Gift of Clean Sheets

To be clean, what does that mean?

To be washed from dirt and impurities. 

To be refreshed and given a new scent that doesn’t contain the foul smells.

To be dried in the sun or dried with heat.

To make sure the item is free of germs.

What needs cleaning in your life?

What have you neglected for a long time?

Have you cleared your mind of constant negative thoughts?

Have you cleaned up your words?

Have you cleaned up your actions?

We all need a little cleaning to wash off the dust of daily life. 

So take a moment, do a little cleaning. 

This will change your actions. 

You know that feeling of laying down on freshly laundered sheets?  It feels amazing!  Maybe that is specific to our family but clean sheets are quite important. Having children in the military, they take clean to another level. Our twin boys attend a military college.  Each week their room is inspected for cleanliness.  The hangers have to contain exactly one finger length between each shirt or pants.  They have to own a footlocker for your miscellaneous items.  The floor has to be clean, the bathroom spotless.  If something fails inspection they get demerits. Pretty astounding, right?  Think about when you do not clean things in your home.  We are all guilty of this activity.  What happens?  The dirt, dust and grime build up because of neglect.  When you do finally reach the moment to cleanse and polish the items it takes twice as long to scrub, dust, sweet and mop the area.  Not only does this take extra time, you have an increased chance of getting sick because the dirt, dust, germs deteriorate air quality in your home.  If you have clutter everywhere what happens?  You trip and fall and in some cases get hurt.  I can hear you saying, “I hate to clean.” Agreed.  I know a handful of folks who like to clean but the necessity to clean never goes away.  Now, let us move this into our everyday life.  What happens if you do not take a little time to wash off and sanitize our thoughts and our spiritual life? We start to thrive off negative thoughts and emotions.  If you wake up in a negative mindset that sets the tone for your entire day.  Positive folks want others to be happy.  Even if their circumstances are vastly different.  Recently I read a quote that said, “It’s hard to be happy when you do not clean up or even throw out what is making you sad.” It is not always easy or even possible, but perhaps a little dusting off would help you make it to a better place mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  Those of us who have kids, particularly a quiver full fought the battle of cleaning constantly with kids when they were little.  When our daughter was about 8 years old she was quite distraught because she could not find a particular stuffed animal that was important to her.  My husband and I walked into her room and it looked like a tornado had blown through not once but several times.  It was utter chaos. Our parenting style was we were not going to do everything for them but rather start helping them and guiding them and ultimately they finish the job.  We told her to start by picking things up off the floor.  Find the garbage and put it in the trash, put the clothes in the basket, etc. Our daughter took everything, clothes, stuffed animals, trash, everything and deposited said items onto her bed.  She came to us quite proud that she had “cleaned” her room.  We walked into her room and well, yes the room was clean but the bed looked like the tornado just picked everything up and put it on her bed.  In all of her “cleaning” she still had not found the all important stuffed animal.  We told her to perhaps actually take everything off the bed and put it in their special place.  After all, she will eventually have to go to bed and well, it would be hard to sleep on that pile.  “I’ll just sleep on the floor.” She said, with a sigh we were in for the long haul helping her clean her room.  We threw away the garbage.  Put the toys in their special place and what do you know?  Her important stuffed animal was at the bottom of the pile.  How many times do we chuck everything into a corner or pile our “dirty bits” on top of a metaphorical bed?  I know I am guilty of these actions a lot.  We all need to take a little time each week or each day to put on those clean sheets.  Clean out that pile of negative emotions, find that small sliver of clean and start to declutter our life. I would add in this particularly dark time in the world it is so necessary to clean those spiritual sheets.  Wash our minds, scrub our souls.  Pray for others.  I leave you with a witty quote from Lauren Bacall: “The best things in life are clean living, good works and big sapphires.  And not in that order.”

  My books are on Amazon:  

The Quacktastic Adventures of Ellie and Lord Barks a Lot

Clean it Up! Wash it Up!

Coming soon:

The Case of the Missing Honk Honk

The Case of the Missing Ornaments

Appalachian Allegory